I just think this concept is very unrealistic. Maybe that's why divorce is so prevalent, you know?How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your entire life with one person? People constanly change ?
I agree I think people feel a certain way at a certain time and act on it i.e. get married because it feels right then, people can't predict how they are going to feel in 2,5,10 years etc. yet assume they will feel the same way. I don't think people get married with the intent of getting divorced. We do grow, we change, but I think when you really do love someone you work hard at getting through those changes and hard times, and often people give up way too soon, hence the high divorce rate, then they start the cycle over with someone new. I like the idea of marriage but i don't believe in it. I will never get married because I have seen feelings change from personal experience and with others, nothing lasts forever....How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your entire life with one person? People constanly change ?
Divorce is prevalent because people get married to the wrong person at the wrong time and/or for the wrong reasons. In today's world, pleasing self has become the priority over commitment, loyalty, integrity and honor. Too many rush into marriage out of fear of being alone or unloved, seeking security (instead of learning to take care of themselves) or to escape a bad situation. They don't really know themselves well at all, and often refuse to see their mate for who he/she really is. They have unrealistic expectations and become easily disappointed when married life doesn't turn out to be the fantasy they expected. They think that no one else has ever felt what they're feeling, and it's unfortunate that they often don't listen to the wisdom of those who've been where they are or who have their best interests at heart. Instead, they lunge headlong and ill-prepared into a train wreck.
Marriage to the right person is fabulous, but it requires work, compromise, patience and protection--and from both halves of the couple. And it's not 50%-50%; it's 100%-100%. These days, people just seem to be less apt to put forth the effort.
You know that you were meant to spend the rest of your life with the person because you just know. I hated being told that, but it's true. You see your mate objectively (warts 'n all!) yet you still feel an undeniable inner peace at the thought of spending the rest of your life with him/her. You don't just want to be together, you feel that you were destined to be together--but not necessarily the way it's depicted in the movies.
You and your Mr./Mrs. Right have the same core values, work ethic, standards and beliefs system--those things aren't likely to change as you age. You think alike and both bring emotional balance, independence and maturity to the relationship. Because you are alike in these basics, you share and work toward the same goals together throughout the rest of your lives. This helps you to grow closer together, not further apart.How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your entire life with one person? People constanly change ?
You never know. You just have to adapt to changes and be a better person yourself.
Divorce happens when we no longer want to accept and work our way through all the changes. When we insist on things and people being the same throughout OUR lives.
How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your entire life with one person? People constanly change ?
I think its very realistic. I see where your coming from though. Your definitely right, people do change constantly. Nobody is the same in the 20's like the were in their 40's. That's part of life, but the reason why marriages still work is the fact that some people are able to find another human being that they get along with, who they have important values in common with. Most people that stay married happily are people who know their with someone that will try to work hard on showing them the up most respect, and someone that has helped them grow in a good way, most importantly, they are with someone they are capable of communicating with very well. That's really all it takes. As long as both people try hard to treat each other well, things will be ok in the long run. Otherwise the divorce rate would be 99% not 50%.How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your entire life with one person? People constanly change ?
I don't think there's a cut and dry answer to that. Some people are well-suited for one long relationship while others aren't. Some people feel marriage is necessary while others do not. I've never been married but I've had both a seven year and an almost nine year relationship that were wonderful but eventually over time we grew apart. It happens!How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your entire life with one person? People constanly change ?
People do NOT change constantly. People have core values and beliefs that they hold on to, and these govern the way they act.
Lots of people think that they can change someone, but it is a rare event when someone actually gets someone to change.
If you are compatible with someone, and have similar beliefs and core values, it is not difficult to live together. When you have this, and love, too, it is very possible to spend the rest of your life together.
Regards,
DanHow do you know if you want to spend the rest of your entire life with one person? People constanly change ?
Ya but I think of dealing with change as half the fun!!!
Most complain that being with one person all the time is boring but I find that the opposite is true. That person will change a million times during their life time. It is the fun of rediscovering you mate that adds spice to your life. How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your entire life with one person? People constanly change ?
Yes, people change. It's unrealistic to expect them not to, besides would you really want to be married to the exact same person 10, 20, 30 years down the road? It's how the change is handled and if you grow together or apart as you change that determines how successful your marriage will be. If you talk about goals and dreams and 5 year and 10 year plans on a regular basis, those changes are more likely to be compatible with your spouse than if you don't communicate.
